Archive for February, 2010

My Blond Friend Angie

February 25, 2010

Isn’t she wonderful blond?

Great yellow bikini

February 22, 2010

Your mother and my Buttocks

February 12, 2010

pefect butt

A married couple was in a terrible accident where the

Man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the

Husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body

Because he was too skinny. So his wife offered to donate

Some of her own skin. However, the only skin on her body

That the doctor felt was suitable would have to come

from her ass. The husband and wife agreed that they

would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they

requested that the doctor also honor their secret. After

All, this was a very delicate matter. After the surgery was

completed, everyone was astounded at the man’s new face.

He looked more handsome than he ever had before! All his

Friends and relatives just went on and on about his youthful

Beauty!  One day, he was alone with his wife, and he was

overcome with emotion at her sacrifice. He said, ‘Dear,

I just want to thank you for everything you did for me.

How can I possibly repay you?’

‘My darling,’ she replied,

‘I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother

kiss you on the cheek.’

Brilliant Lawyer and Not So Dumb Blond

February 11, 2010

A blond and a lawyer are seated next to each other on a flight from Los Angeles to New York.

Blonde, Dumb

The lawyer asks if she would like to play a fun game. The blond, tired, just wants to take a nap, so she politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer
persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun.

He says, “I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me five dollars, and vice versa.”

Again, she declines and tries to get some sleep.

The lawyer, now agitated, says, “Okay, if you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5, and if I don’t know the answer, I will pay you $500.”

This catches the blond’s attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment, agrees to the game.

The lawyer asks the first question: “What’s the distance from the earth to the moon?”

The blond doesn’t say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5.00 bill, and hands it to the lawyer.

“Okay,” says the lawyer, “your turn.”

She asks, “What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?”

The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references … no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modem and searches the Internet and the Library of Congress … no answer. Frustrated, he sends e-mails to all his friends and coworkers but to no avail.

After an hour, he wakes the blond and hands her $500.

The blond thanks him and turns back to get some more sleep.

The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, stirs the blond and asks, “Well, what’s the answer?”

Without a word, the blond reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5, and goes back to sleep.

Stamp Malfunction

February 10, 2010

The Postal Services created a stamp with a picture of President Obama on it. The Postal Service noticed that the stamp was not sticking to envelopes. This enraged the President, who demanded a full investigation. After a month of testing and $1.73 million in congressional spending, a special Presidential commission presented the following findings:

obama stump
1.The stamp is in perfect order.

2.There is nothing wrong with the glue.

3. People are spitting on the wrong side.